Almost two years ago I found myself on the roof of a church smoking some cigars with a couple of dear friends to celebrate the midnight hour of my birthday. After a little while, one of them posed the reflective question, “what was the biggest thing you learned this year?”. I spent some time in thought, but mainly it just triggered something I reflected on a lot the months leading up to this moment because it had been a crazy six months. One of those time periods that changes the course of your life. I found myself back in Louisiana after spending two years away. A wild change of heart, and desires to explore the roots I never knew laid beneath the soil I grew up in swelled up within me, to the point that I decided to move back home. Something I never thought I’d do. I’m not writing this saying I know this truth about friendship and life and I contain this wisdom because I’m so special. I think I might’ve come off that way that night with my friends. But there is definitely some truth to my response to that question that night, and it is something I have experienced, and I am excited to dive into the mystery of it for the rest of my life. No answers, just hints and leads.
When I decided to leave home I thought nobody here could give me anything, could understand me, could challenge me to seek after a more meaningful life… I thought that I could only find deep, intimate friendships far away. I thought I could only live life to the full with people that I could immediately be vulnerable with and share deep things with even if I only had lunch with them once. I didn’t understand people and the natural unfolding of relationships, and I still don’t. But I think I am on to something. My answer that night was honest. I talked about how I learned that maybe the people that knew me growing up the first 18 years of my life and chose to be part of it, know me pretty well and those connections are really special. Maybe it’s okay we don’t talk about deep stuff or agree on certain matters or enjoy the same exact things. Maybe there’s a bond there anyway. Something deeper and rooted. I shared this and more that night, and there was a freedom I experienced from that vocal vulnerability. Such a power inside of shared realness. The commitment to a friend is beautiful and gritty. We eat at Chipotle and catch up when schedules are busy. We bro out and play sports. We talk about family dynamics and support each other. We aggravate each other. We do life together, no roadmap, just figuring it out. There’s breakthrough moments, but fireworks don’t come around often. It seems to be more about learning to enjoy the presence of the other person, and the everyday stuff.
Here we are, two years later and so much wildness in store. My bestfriend and I are about to embark on an epic road trip throughout the ole USA. From New Orleans to North Carolina, to Tennessee, to Colorado, and back down. Full of dares and conversations, hikes and climbs, thrift stores and trail mix, concerts and friends, stars and bars. An adventure to add to the history of our friendship, and a catapult into the fullness of what this existence offers us.
Here’s a little trip down memory lane to give a colorful expression of our bromance
The sport that sparked this friendship 11 years ago… breaking necks and cashing checks.
The adventure/mission trip that kicked our butts into some solid living… #whatcamera?
Clif Bars and Spikeball… a staple for any fulfilling friendship
Two kinds of people in this life… one’s that slap on some hair gel and baby powder and dance on roofs, and losers. It’s pretty obvious which one’s we are.
Yes, we also bake, we can do it all… #longhairdontcare
And here we are ready to rumble… #Zlatan